How old was he? only forty-five? Too young to die. it was the first heart attack. No, the second. It seems he had one before and never told anyone. Poor man, to go fast. What about the family? isn't there anything for them? so little? Three girls to get married? And the boy . . . how sad! How irresponsible to have a large family in such circumstances, Baba. . . what happened to my Baba? Hush, Sobha don't cry like that or you 'll start mother all over again. shirish. Let me do that for you. Thank god Alka's taking up a job. Imagine he was thinking of sending her to college!
A failure I thought. He couldn't even struggle with death. Just went out meekly. He lived and he died a failure. What's left? Nothing. Only duties incomplete, responsibilities badly shouldered and empty tears. There was no pity in me for him. only contempt. God let me not live like that, having achieved nothing, has been nothing. Not even knowing that your life was nothing. not once could I say My baba said this. He said nothing that was not trivial, did nothing that had any meaning. I searched and searched for the whole of his life for meaning and didn't find it.
when all the noise died down. I realized what had happened. My last way of escape had been closed up. I would never get out of the trap now. I have to shoulder his burdens. I would go on doing it till I died. A wave of huge anger filled me. He wronged me by dying. He continued to wrong me even after his death. There was no help for me. there are no fairy godmothers and rich uncles in real life. not even a god. it makes me laugh when people talk of a god. How childish -- a benign, bearded figure up there who looks after all of us. there's no god. only us
It was a month later and that I came upon the battered briefcase I had seen him carry to work every day of his life. I had often wondered ... what's there in it, baba for you? You go to work, come back, eat, sleep, wake and go to work again. Every single daY.
now I had to hide the briefcase from mother. Even now, that stolid, sullen woman would break down into the most shaming, heartbreaking hysteria. I had never seen her smile at him, never heard her speak a soft word to him. and yet, I could hear her moaning into her pillow every night. I couldn't understand.this is the real story of a Shashi who become hero for mei really like this story because it is really osm and never seen like this dear reader read completely this story and don't miss anything if you miss anything you can't do anything so I request you plz read Karo or enjoy.
And then I saw the two letters. He must have written them that morning. one to his elder brother. Idly curious, I opened it. My own name leaped out.
A failure I thought. He couldn't even struggle with death. Just went out meekly. He lived and he died a failure. What's left? Nothing. Only duties incomplete, responsibilities badly shouldered and empty tears. There was no pity in me for him. only contempt. God let me not live like that, having achieved nothing, has been nothing. Not even knowing that your life was nothing. not once could I say My baba said this. He said nothing that was not trivial, did nothing that had any meaning. I searched and searched for the whole of his life for meaning and didn't find it.
when all the noise died down. I realized what had happened. My last way of escape had been closed up. I would never get out of the trap now. I have to shoulder his burdens. I would go on doing it till I died. A wave of huge anger filled me. He wronged me by dying. He continued to wrong me even after his death. There was no help for me. there are no fairy godmothers and rich uncles in real life. not even a god. it makes me laugh when people talk of a god. How childish -- a benign, bearded figure up there who looks after all of us. there's no god. only us
It was a month later and that I came upon the battered briefcase I had seen him carry to work every day of his life. I had often wondered ... what's there in it, baba for you? You go to work, come back, eat, sleep, wake and go to work again. Every single daY.
now I had to hide the briefcase from mother. Even now, that stolid, sullen woman would break down into the most shaming, heartbreaking hysteria. I had never seen her smile at him, never heard her speak a soft word to him. and yet, I could hear her moaning into her pillow every night. I couldn't understand.this is the real story of a Shashi who become hero for mei really like this story because it is really osm and never seen like this dear reader read completely this story and don't miss anything if you miss anything you can't do anything so I request you plz read Karo or enjoy.
And then I saw the two letters. He must have written them that morning. one to his elder brother. Idly curious, I opened it. My own name leaped out.
